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The Show Wrecker
Is Also A Movie Wrecker!
Jason The Show Wrecker has put together the first ever Tommy & Rumble Movie Reviews! Check out his Rating System and take a look at the reviews!
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Miami Vice
Rated R
Runtime: 2 Hours, 26 Minutes
This movie may share the title with the crappy TV show but it's nothing like it! I will tell you that I'm certainly taking Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx more seriously than I ever did Don Johnson and Phillip Michael Thomas. Unfortunately this movie was like a 2 hour and 26 minute close up. I understand that these guys are good looking but their faces didn't have to take up the entire frame all the time. There was a sex scene and the camera was so close to them, I couldn't tell what body part I was looking at. I'm sure the action scenes would have looked cool if the camera wasn't as jumpy and zoomed out a bit. Also I was lost for the first ten minutes of the movie because I'm neither a vice cop nor a drug dealer so I couldn't understand the "lingo" or "shop talk" they were throwing out. The only good scene was where a bad guy got what was coming to him. But that happened so close to the end of the film, it didn't do much for me.
I have to give this film a BIG "Round Tuit!" I was disappointed and felt they could have presented the story better so a common, law abiding citizen, like me, could understand it better. To be completely honest, I was almost going to give this film "A Gimpy Rabbit" but there was just enough to hold my interest until the end. |
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The Ant Bully
Rated PG
Runtime: 1 Hour, 28 Minutes
This was a fun film. It about a kid named Lucas that gets picked on by the local bully. Lucas then picks on this ant hill that is in his front yard. The ants are tired of Lucas "The Destroyer", as they named him, messing up their home so they make a potion that shrinks him down to their size. They then proceed to teach him how to be an ant! The voices in this film are like a who's who list of celebs. Julia Roberts, Nicolas Cage, Meryl Streep, Paul Giamatti, Lily Tomlin, Bruce Campbell, and many more. Good laughs, good animation, great for the kids and entertaining enough for the adults.
I gave this film a solid "Silver Ticket!" Don't kill yourself to go see it but it is a great time time out for the entire family. Certainly worth going to see! |
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Superman Returns
Rated PG-13
Runtime: 2 Hours, 34 Minutes
This is a fantastic movie! Brandon Routh had a very big set of boots to fill by taking on the part of Superman, and I think he pulled it off magnificently! It was kinda creepy to see hints of Christopher Reeves in the Clark Kent quirkiness and body language but Brandon was still able to make the role his own. Kate Bosworth, is now a strong second for me to Terry Hatcher of actresses that have played Lois Lane. The special effects were awesome and made Superman’s powers even cooler! This film had a great balance of action that surrounds a love story. Even though there was a lot of talk about Superman’s “Cod Piece”, I can honestly say that I didn’t gaze at his meat once during the entire film!
I give this film my highest rating, which is the “Golden Thumb” If you have not gotten a chance to see this film, you need to. It’s a great movie for the entire family so grab the kids and introduce them to one of the greatest super heroes of all time. |
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Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Rated PG-13
Runtime: 2 Hours, 31 Minutes
Great action scenes and fantastic special effects! I was able to stay with the story for the entire movie but there were some points where the film just seemed to drag on a bit too much. The humorous bits that were all throughout the first movie were few and far between in this one. As I said, the action scenes were great but I was a little disappointed at the lack of detailed swords fights like in the first movie with Johnny Depp dueling Orlando Bloom in the Blacksmith’s shop.
I have to give this film my 2nd highest ranking, which is the “Silver Ticket”. I wanted to give it the “Golden Thumb” but because of it dragging on a bit, the lack of the detailed duels, and the lack of the humor I was looking forward to, I just couldn’t. As I said before, the action scenes and the special effects, which were the dominating factors in the film, are what pulled me through to the end. |
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You, Me and Dupree
Rated PG-13
Runtime: 1 Hour, 48 Minutes
A good “Chick Flick”! This is your typical “Unwanted house guest” movie which makes some of the jokes that are throughout the film a bit predictable. However Owen Wilson does a good job of bringing his “A” game for a few big laughs. Amazingly, Matt Dillon still seems to have career in Hollywood and does an “okay” job as the straight guy. Kate Hudson is completely hot and Michael Douglas plays a good over protective father-in-law. There is a major continuity mistake involving Matt and a whiskey bottle and there are a few skin scenes worth mentioning. For the ladies, Owen shows off his bare butt for a good chunk of time. For the guys, it’s not really skin, but you do get to see Kate walk around in her underwear and a see-through night gown for a few scenes. Very Hot!!
Overall, I had to give this movie a “Round Tuit” rating. It was a cute film and there were some laughs but my sides weren’t hurting when I left and after it was over I just had that “Huh” feeling. |
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| The Show Wrecker's Rating System.
I wanted to come up with something other than the thumbs or stars that everyone else always uses. So here is my rather unique rating system that is now banned in 2 countries!
The Golden Thumb is the highest rating I give a film. If I give this rating, that means I feel this movie has got everything a great movie should! A great story, great acting, great effects, great action, great directing, and...well, you get the "great" picture!
The Silver Ticket is awarded to those movies that I think are good movies, but there might be just a few things that keep it from getting The Golden Thumb. These films are certainly still worth the time to go and see and I don't think you will be too disappointed.
The Round Tuit is given to those films that are worth seeing if you have the time to get "a-round tuit!" And if you don't, I wouldn't worry about it cause you could get "a-round tuit" when it comes out on DVD. These are definitely ones you should see at the early matinee shows to save a few bucks.
The Gimpy Rabbit is awarded to those films that are going to need all the luck they can possibly get to be a hit in the box office. These are movies I would not recommend going to see in the theater. I would suggest waiting until they happen to show up on HBO or something so you pay to see them indirectly and you don't feel like you've been cheated out of your money.
The Steamer is the worst rating I would award a film. These movies just flat out suck! These would be movies I wouldn't even bother with if they were being shown for free! I don't give this rating out very often but to the film that made me come up with The Steamer was a 1999 film called "Eye of the Beholder" starring Ashley Judd and Ewan McGregor. I actually walked out of that film angry for having wasted the time to see it!
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